Lord, anything right about now. There's a duck nest in the empty lot next door. When the babies hatch, she'll have a hell of a time getting them to the reservoir (too many fences and the babies must walk). Not sure there's anything I can do about that, but I sure want to save those ducklings. Heard the familiar thump, bump, whack! on Memorial Day emanating from Test Case's bathroom. Caesar boy up to his old tricks again. Damn sure there's nothing I can do about that either. I wish I could fix it, but really all I could do was shove a thickness of towel between his shoulder and the water faucet because it was beating him up pretty badly. All that was there between his head and the metal door railing was hubby's hand. It didn't seem to go on and on forever like it usually does. I'm getting USED TO THEM. shit, did i just say that?
How can I find the words to express my anger, frustration and misery towards the universe, towards fate for giving my son grand mal (now called tonic-clonic) seizures. Fuck, I am so sick of it. I am helpless, guilty and sad.
Everytime he has one I feel like a little piece of him is floating off into the ether, never to be heard of again. I pray his employers won't find some reason to sack him.
And yet, I am strangely grateful. He is alive. He is functioning. His true friends have stuck by him.
Life moves on...
So here's a funny little thing that happened last night. I took the Warrior Princess shopping for her first ever high-heeled shoes for the 6th grade completion ceremony. She proudly walked around in the house with them on, and then exclaimed "Hey mom, these shoes make your butt wag."
That's my girl.
20 comments:
Her shoes make YOUR butt wag? An amazing accomplishment!
Obviously, she meant that walking in those shoes made her own butt wag. Snay, don't be dense!
I'll need to see pics of the wagging butt to be sure.
That sucks ass about the seizures. :(
Test Case...Ducklings. Wish I could come up with something smart to say. *HUGS*
Are the first pair high heels, sling backs or pumps?!
My friend told me the other day how she was on a bus that stopped to let some ducks and ducklings cross the road heading for the park. Instead they went into a garden. She was getting off the bus, so she ushered them out. They visited every single garden till they got to the park, with her palying mother hen (or should I say mother duck) all the way to the park. If this wouldn't work for you, do you have a local humane society that would help you out?
The thing about mama ducks is that they will always accept help getting their babies to water.
Speaking of babies and wagging butts, they sure do grow up fast.
Rose
xo
Prayers for you and your son and husband. I can only imagine your pain and distress at his seizures. And blessings to your waggying butt daughter!
The but wagging shoe story should be submitted to Reader's Digest. That is hillarious!!!!!
On the flip side, I am very sorry for what you have to deal with concerning your son. I read and re read the passage trying to figure out what the problem was. I don't know what to say, other than I am really sorry.
Love may not seem like enough sometimes, but lean on that. You love him, vise versa, and there is love for you from other places. He is here and healthy in other respects and that is good right?
Oh, and GO DUCKSAVER!!!!!!!!!!!!
You get a gold star for that!
well done fix it mom-knowing you've done everything you can, and still loving him through it.... and the butt wagging-priceless!
Have you read THE SPIRIT CATCHES YOU AND YOU FALL DOWN? It's about an epileptic Hmong girl--mostly it explores cultural/medical differences in how the seizures and their "treatment" are regarded.
I'm sorry for what you live with, on that front.
diesel -no butt wagging as long as I draw breath! LOL
tess, val and rose - thank you. After consulting a local duck expert I have a plan for the ducklings. If I'm lucky it will work! Quack!
K+ -you are the best.
wreckless -he has JME (juvenile myoclonic epilepsy). He started having grand mals at age 15. He hates the seizures more than I do and is compliant with his meds, but sometimes he still gets them. He will probably need an add-on med at this point cuz his body is so good at metabolizing the current drug.
kris- thank you. It helps a lot to vent!
jocelyn -yes I heard of that book when it came out cuz I think it was written by a local. I do like reading about others' experiences, it helps me cope.
I'm so sorry to hear about your son's latest seizure. It must tear at your heart to see your boy suffer like that. I don't think he can be sacked for it though, aren't there laws in place to protect people with chronic illnesses from being fired?
Your daughter though....too funny!!
There's a cute book called "make way for ducklings", about a family of ducks that needs to get from point A to point B in Boston, and how everyone had to stop and let them cross busy streets, etc.
Ugh. Ouch. Boy, you sure are getting your share, and then some.
I don't mean to minimize, yet I have to ask: Don't you find yourself pondering which carries the most ominous ramifications? Grand mal seizures, or a daughter who realizes that high heels make her butt wag. You are facing quite the stack of challenges, my dear! You will handle each with greatness of heart. I know this.
HA!!! I just read what Snay said and your response. Very funny, Snay Dude.
jojo -"Make Way for Ducklings" holds an honored spot on the family bookshelf. I think his manager is cool, so far it has only cost him two shifts.
gawpo - I don't think snay was making fun of me. I think he was just saying 'yeah that's funny and here's how it was even funnier'
Well the girl still thinks boys are kind of yucky which I'm sure will change. She's got a good head on her shoulders and we have a lot of talks about all that boy/girl stuff. Anyway, I have tried to influence her as best I can now while she still listens to me!
Oh Claire, just because you're getting used to them, doesn't make it better... it's a kinda fatalistic acceptance of what cannot be changed
Don't those little ones grow too fast... high heels... next the makeup, the boyfriends, her own car, college...
my baby's leaving home next month... booo hooo
Hello, Claire. I found your blog from an entry on Ann's blog (I think...I've been visiting blogs this evening. Yours is quite interesting, and, if you don't mind, I will visit more often.
Ann -you are a treasure.
ricci -you are welcome to visit anytime!
"There's a duck nest in the empty lot next door. When the babies hatch, she'll have a hell of a time getting them to the reservoir (too many fences and the babies must walk)."
Use defeat, deduct, defense and detail in a sentence.
De feet of de duck went over de fence before de tail...
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