I love working with kids, and they make me laugh all the time. Here is a short collection from the Forever Unknown Elementary School.
A special needs 4th grader's whispered reaction to me about another kid, a blowhard in training, pontificating on and on about nothing anyone is interested in:
"This guy is making me sick!"
Written by a 5th grader on a test in response to the question, "Do you think Doug could make it across the pass on his own?"
"I think that Doug could of made it across becaus if Charlie a coger (note: that's cougar) made it than a hummen bean could do it."
Overheard exchange between two 3rd graders:
"Your mom is fat!"
"Well your mom doesn't wear a bra!"
In first grade the teacher tells the kids her son turned 21 recently and one of her students (the Hellion, see below) says:
"Wow he can drink beer now!"
This is kind of sad. During Red Ribbon Week (Just Say No!), the second grade teacher was talking to her students about drugs and alcoholic. One boy raises his hand and says,
"My dad is an alcoholic!"
During a 4th grade discussion of geography, specifically the North American continent, a boy raises his hand to explain:
"My dad said we should take over Canada because there are very little people there and nothing but ice."
teacher: "Well I'm sure your dad was kidding."
kid: "No he wasn't."
Just in case you've lost faith, I witnessed an act of kindness yesterday between the current first grade Hellion (multiple suspensions, detensions, you get the idea) and a diminuative Down's syndrome girl in his class. She veered off the path to lunch and he gently put his arm around her and, speaking softly, he directed her back to the cafeteria.
16 comments:
"My dad is an alcoholic!"
Well, I guess it's better than not knowing, huh?
I love the...Your mom is fat! Well your mom doesn't wear a bra.
Kids. They're honest (and it hurts!)
I'm glad the hellion has a sense of compassion after all.
Hope you're feeling better Claire.
(((((hugs))))
Rose
xo
Out of the mouths of babes, eh?
Well at least that one boy has a good heart deep down. But even in my school, the special needs kids were off limits when it came to general schoolchild harassment... even the bullies & troublemakers were kind to them.
diesel -the poor kid was only in
2nd grade, so I'm not sure how much he ought to have on his poor young mind at that age.
tess -yeah, I always love the responses I get when I ask them how old they think I am!
rose -he really does, that's why I'm hopeful. The poor kid has an awful home situation and he's angry. He has to learn appropriate ways to burn it off instead of punching someone in the stomach, ya know? btw-I'm fine, been feeling great(maybe you got me mixed up w/ someone else??)
jojo- yes that's true for the most part at my school and I'm glad for it. It makes my job easier if the so-called normal children are nice.
Thank heavens for that last one.
Cougars...humans...all the same, really.
One of my class was in tears today after getting hit by a football in the playground (he was in the "cage" where ball games are played at break). He was over-reacting for ages, but at the end of the lesson he came and apologized to me, saying, "Miss, I've been a jerk"! (This is NOT standard age 13 British English language, so his little autistic brain has taken it in and made it its own).
This is kind of sad. During Red Ribbon Week (Just Say No!), the second grade teacher was talking to her students about drugs and alcoholic. One boy raises his hand and says,
"My dad is an alcoholic!"
Actually, it's quite possible the kid's dad is an alcoholic in recovery. Lot's of parents bring their kids to meetings. And even someone with years of solid recovery is still an alcoholic.
In that context, (and this may be hard for some to understand), being an alcoholic is actually a good thing.
jocelyn -no doubt you are holding back on us and have some comp class writing quips that outdo anything I can come up with.
val -Aww, it was sweet that he apologized in his own way.
mark -true dat, but this kid's dad was doing a stint in rehab at the time. Also his parents had a particularly nasty divorce. I hope the dad managed to stay sober. And you're right once an alchie, always an alchie. (runs in my family unfortunately)
Or as I like to say, I'm just a garden-variety drunk.
:oD>
I just love that brutal honesty.
However, I will assure you that your job is the LAST I could ever attempt...and that is intense, considering how I hate MY job! Hahahaha!!!
xxx
too funny! i luv how kids just say what they mean. and that last one is soo sweet. makes me think that there is a reason he's usually a jerk, probly b/c he sees jerks at home all the time. maybe that was part of his real self coming o/...
I love reading your student posts. Such poignancy in the humor.
axe -kids say the darnest things
kris -his home life is complicated due to the selfish adults in his life. no wonder he's angry
g -thanks. I really love what I do.
This is too funny. Kids are so darn honest. Especially when discussing their domestic situations!
aw definitely out of the mouth of babes... and you have to be so careful what you say in front of children since they often mimic their parents...
the cartoon certainly rang true with me... I hated school, but in those dark old days it was nothing like schooling is today
hope you and yours are all well and having a lovely weekend
lotsa luv ann xxxxx
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